Explaining the rules to your daughter

Comment expliquer les règles à sa fille

The onset of the first period is an important stage in a woman's life. This event marks the period of puberty , this symbolic transition from childhood to adolescence . Often feared by those first concerned, it is also feared by their parents . As a mom or dad , how do you explain the rules to your daughter ? Follow our advice to best guide your child in this self-learning process.

How to explain the rules to your daughter?

Having your period for the first time is a real upheaval for a young girl. This major change is accompanied by other destabilizing manifestations linked to puberty: emerging hairs, growing breasts, etc. Without having been explained in advance, the phenomenon can cause amazement, incomprehension, worry, embarrassment, disgust or even shame. Preparing your daughter for this event is therefore more than recommended.

Choose the right time

On average, girls have their first period between 12 and 13 years old. In the event of early puberty, they can even be adjusted from 8-10 years old. Therefore, it is advisable to discuss the subject of menstruation with your daughter from early childhood, around 5-6 years old. The ideal: take advantage of certain opportunities to give a few simple explanations, for example when your child finds sanitary protection while rummaging in your bag or is surprised to see a few drops of residual blood in the toilet.

Don't avoid the subject

Do you find the topic delicate and difficult to approach? It's normal. However, there is no point in ignoring it: silences and unsaid words, by maintaining the mystery, generate ignorance and fear of the unknown. Listen to your daughter, pay attention to her reactions and take the time to answer her questions.

Evolve your speech over time 

Be sure to adapt your speech to your daughter's age and current concerns. The rules signifying the possibility of having children, bring them up during discussions around the famous question “how do we make babies?” » or later sexual intercourse. You can start by talking about a nest made by the mother every month in her womb to accommodate a possible little one, which ends up being destroyed and eliminated naturally if there is no baby this time. Then, gradually go into details, using less childish and more precise vocabulary.

Use the right words

Vagina, uterus, egg, penis, sperm, fertilization, etc. The question of periods can be embarrassing or even frightening, because it is linked to sexuality, an intimate and taboo subject par excellence. However, it is important to use the right terms. Don't be afraid to say these words. The more your daughter matures, the more she is able to hear them, to better understand how her body works and demystify the phenomenon.

Talking to your daughter about periods with complete complicity

Talking to your daughter about periods as a mother… or father

Even for a mother, it is not always easy to talk to her daughter about menstruation. Perhaps this goes against your modesty; perhaps you fear this transition to adulthood, a harbinger of a future sexuality. But have no fear! You know what it is and you have a clear idea of ​​the situations she may face. Please feel free to share your own experience. Tell him at what age you had your first period, how you experienced it and have experienced it since. Whatever your particular case (regularity of the cycle, presence or absence of PMS , painful periods , heavy periods , endometriosis , etc.), nuance your comments so as not to idealize or dramatize the thing. Above all, remind her that every woman experiences her menstrual cycle differently.

As a dad, the apprehension can be even greater. If it's the bloody appearance that puts you off, put the facts into perspective: it's only a few milliliters of blood; it's not dirty; it is a natural and healthy biological phenomenon. If it's the lack of information that bothers you, find out beforehand and use specific educational resources, for example a book specially designed to explain periods to your daughter . Despite everything, if you feel unable to address the subject alone, seek the intervention of a competent and trusted person who will be able to do it with you or in your place. Aunt, big sister, family friend, general practitioner, gynecologist: there are many people who can support you in this process.

Advising your daughter on managing her periods

Once her first period has arrived, give your teenager practical advice and solutions.

  • Talk to him about the different types of menstrual flow, to help him identify the nature of his.
  • Tell her that it is normal to have an irregular cycle, especially in the first year.
  • Offer and show her different models of sanitary protection, knowing that external devices are often easier to use for young girls, such as menstrual panties and washable napkins.
  • Give him an airtight pouch to slip into his bag to transport his protection discreetly.
  • Introduce her to the menstrual swimsuit for her middle and high school pool sessions or her seaside vacations.
  • Advise her to keep a small calendar online or on paper to track her menstrual cycle and detect any abnormal events.
  • Encourage her to tell you about possible pain or other bothersome symptoms ( spotting , fatigue,mood changes , etc.).

You are now ready to get through this first period with your daughter! To make your task even easier, Perdième has imagined a first rules box to offer to transform this sometimes dreaded moment into a joyful moment.

teen menstrual panty box

Written by cd